Why Do We Fear Change?

Individuals typically seek out psychotherapy with the idea of promoting positive change in their lives. Many sessions focus on a person’s desire to improve things such as their relationships, mood, health, or communication. We often discuss several changes they could make in order to promote increased happiness, security, and over all wellbeing. That’s the easy part. When it comes down to actually trying to make the changes the struggle typically begins and resistance may develop. The problem is that we all have the ability to create positive changes in our lives, yet our distorted fear based perceptions can often lead to stagnation. Fear of success and fear of failure are two common aspects of the fear of change. They both reflect similar beliefs of low self-worth and self-doubt.

Fear of change and fear of failure typically go hand in hand. We can feel worried and anxious when we even think of undertaking new challenges because we doubt our abilities, our intelligence or our capacity to overcome obstacles that may arise. We fear not measuring up, making a mistake, and being judged. The possibility of failure may be so threatening that the perceived outcome does not merit the risk.

Fear of success is the flip side of fear of failure. We are often afraid of change because we fear our power and ability to succeed. The idea of embracing happiness and truly succeeding may evoke many negative beliefs stemming from low self-esteem. We may feel we don’t deserve to be happy or that our changes will be negatively perceived by others.

These all too common fears are extremely limiting. Fear can stop you from really living. Imagine life without change. Although it might feel secure, it would be static, boring and dull. If you have ever felt stuck, frustrated or bored, it may be the fear of change that is causing the problem. Discussing your fears and underlying issues of self-esteem with a psychotherapist may be a fi rst step on your path to self-growth.